Wednesday, January 2, 2013

Most Fascinating Peeps - Deezy Style

Barbara Walters has released her most fascinating people of 2012 and once I saw that Honey Boo Boo was on the list (and I was not), I decided I should do my own version of this list (ok, so I may or may not have had a lil inspiration from another blog for this idea but that's neither here nor there). So, in no particular order, here we go.

1. Kanye West. 
Lezzbehonest here for a minute. Not everyone can bang Kim Kardashian - ok, so that's a lie. We all know she really should be called the kim kardashian buffet cause everyone can have some (oh snap) - after showing up with a bottle of Jack at an award show and verbally assaulting sweet T-Swizzle. Yet somehow he managed to clean out Kim's closet (literally), and even worse, somehow I managed to quote him during the election. When people questioned how I could vote Republican, I replied that I didn't believe in women's rights or equality, and that no one should forget George Bush hates black people. But let's not forget the REAL reason Kanye is still one of the absolute most fascinating creatures to ever walk this planet. When asked by Barbara Walters in an interview what he most wanted people to know about him, he responded with "that I'm black." And after such an intelligent statement as that was, you now understand why he repeatedly fascinates me. That and the fact that my 2013 began with the following txt "Kanye knocked Kim K up. Welcome to 2013."

 2. John McAfee
I don't really know where to begin when it comes to this guy but he is nothing short of fascinating. Let me tell you why. He made BILLIONS of dollars, moved to Belize and then when his neighbor showed up dead, he claimed the government was framing him. So he pulled a Sadam Hussein and hid in a hole in his backyard with a box over his head. Not really sure why the police didn't pick the box up. Then he escaped to Guatemala, faked a heart attack and somehow ended up in Miami. After meeting up with his secret friend to pick up a wad of $5 bills, he proceeded to walk down South Beach eating sushi while telling reporters he just wanted to get his girlfriends - note the plural and the fact that one is 21 and one is 17 - back. I'm not a psychic but I think this all makes a lot of sense. 

 3. Antwoine Dodson
He protects his sister, he thinks them fries from chick fil a are da bomb, he has a website called "allthatantoine" and he has an as seen on tv costume made after him - so many in fact that the wig machine broke spitting out wigs. He is a hero and if you need further explanation as to why he is a most fascinating person, then you need to stop reading my blog because you just do not get it. Shame on you. 

 4. Joran Van Der Sloot
I don't know who is more fascinating: this guy for the simple fact that he has killed two girls yet somehow still managed to knock another up while in prison or the baby mama who still wanted to get her a piece of dat.  I can barely find a decent dinner date and this guy is getting dessert! All the more reason prisoners fascinate me. 

 5.  Janelle Evans
North Carolina go on and raise up...Janelle Evans is the pride and joy of our fine state. Not only is she the proud teen mom of Jace, but she just can't get her act together to save her life. She beat up another girl for messing with Kieffa (another star in life), she told her mom Barbara that she just could NOT stop smoking weed, and she proclaimed on national television that she would rather go to jail then miss the Kesha concert, since Kesha is her idol after all. I don't even want to think about what my mom would do if I told her I just couldn't stop smoking the doobies. Oh, and let's not forget that she (Jenelle, not my mother)  is also the owner of the (pretty funny actually) tweeter handle @PBandJenelly_1 where you can find her marriage on the rocks splayed out for all to read. The good news is, she and her new husband are not splitting after all...for now.

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