Monday, December 13, 2010

Instant Good Cheer

This past weekend, during one of my “I have no facebook and have all this time on my hands” realizations, I picked up a dirty mag at the store. I figured I might as well be using this no facebook AND no boyfriend time wisely (let’s be honest. They rarely occur simultaneously). By reading completely inappropes magazines that make me blush. One of the random factoids included in the magazine was that the smell of toast will instantly make you feel better. Wait, now that I’m writing this, maybe it’s bacon. At any rate, either bacon OR toast has been scientifically proven to instantly put you in a better mood. Which is weird to me for several reasons. Mainly because I can think of 7,000 things that would probably put me in an instant good mood before bacon or toast. Per usual, I've taken the liberty to share the Top 10 with you below.

But first, it's important to note that I am usually always in a good mood. My disposition is never far from sunny. My class ring from college is a black onyx and it’s actually become hilarious how many times people have mistaken it for a mood ring. I mean, how could it be black if I’m always jolly? And besides, who even wears a mood ring anymore?

1. Pete. Pete will make anyone’s day 9x brighter and cheerful. Especially when he follows you into the bathroom and watches you undress. Who doesn’t want a handsome Peteing Tom to oogle them while nekkid?

2. A pastry. I brought a cute boy a giant éclair from a local bakery one morning. He told me if I kept feeding him this way, he wasn’t going to live to see 85. I told him when he was 85, he would look back on his life and wish he had enjoyed pastry treats more often in his life. I believe in dessert. And I believe in enjoying it any time you see fit.

3. A daily dose of It’s blocked at my office, but I’m looking into the availability of an iphone app (man I feel cool saying I have an iphone).

4. A shimmy. If something makes me happy, I shimmy. If I don’t have a reason to shimmy, I shimmy anyway.

5. Pirate Jokes. These are guaranteed to put even the meanest of souls in a better mood. Instantly.

6. Justin Bieber. This morning, a dear friend sent me an interactive Christmas greeting, complete with a portrait of Justin Bieber halfway through the message. Instant good mood accomplished. True story.

7. A lifetime movie. Seriously. Feeling badly about your life? Watch one of these bad boys and you’ll feel better about yours. Instantly.

8. A feather boa. I’m not sure why but I really like them. Much like jingle bells, they are hard to resist.

9. Surprise leftovers from a meeting down the hall. Since I’m usually in a bad mood because I’m hungry, leftovers instantly bring up the morale of the entire department.

10. An email from my boss that says “hey, why don’t you take the rest of the week off?” I mean, this has never happened but I’m pretty sure it would make my mood even greater.

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