This past weekend was my ten year high school reunion. Yes, I know I'm dating myself here by telling you that. I started the day off by posting to the reunion facebook page that I was going to tell everyone I invented post-it notes (you know...from that movie). This got lots of responses and even a demand that I do the spotlight dance to Time After Time. You'll be sad to know that I did not do the spotlight dance but instead chose to do the stanky leg for everyone. Immediately after teaching people how to dougie (well, the one part I know). I brought my yearbook with me so I could point out, just in case anyone had forgotten, that I was voted wittiest female in our high school class (and yes, I may or may not have peaked in high school. I realize this). I also wore a dress from my kid sister's closet. We had a picture board with "Name That Teacher!" on it but I only remembered one teacher. Yes, it was the teacher my brother dated while I was in her class but nonetheless. Has my memory really gotten that bad? I mean, there were people there I didn't remember ever seeing before in my life! So, all I know is Lord have mercy because no way in hell will I remember them in 20 years if I don't remember them after 10. Except the man who became a woman in the last ten years. I will def remember him. i mean her.
The best part though? I stayed out till 4:30 in the mawnin. I took a detour and didn't go to the after party but instead went to a cute boy's house (who I have known not since high school but since middle school. Let's make that shiz facebook official!). We went out with some of his friends (and got caught by some of mine who had wondered where I had disappeared to. Yes, THAT is where I disappeared to) then went back to his house to watch a movie. Now, I know my mother and I also know the following facts:
1) i am 28 years old.
2) i do not have a house key to my parents' house.
3) my mother will wake up at 3a and wonder where I am if I am not at home.
4) If I am not home when she wakes up she will assume I am either drunk, doing things I shouldn't be doing with a boy, dead in a ditch or perhaps all 3.
So, because I know these truths to be self-evident, I sent my mother a txt at 2:30 that said "I am out with so and so. I will be home later." At 3:30 she responded with "I am locking the door." Now, this was a conundrum. I told the cute boy this and his response was "why is your mom even awake at 3:30 in the morning?" I told him that was beside the fact. That what mattered here was that she was telling me she was locking me out. Which meant she was telling me to stay out ALL night. Except, if I actually stayed out all night, I knew I would be in trouble. I should probably admit to you that when this txt came in, we were having a nice little make out sesh on the couch. So, here we are making out on the couch and my mother calls looking for me. it was just like high school.
only, it was more like a fine wine version of high school. because it was so much better than real high school. and if wine gets better as it ages, then bring on the reunions! i do love me some wine after all.